Right – first up today, I am proud to announce a change of name for the blog. The Frost Family Blog seemed fine when I started this blog last year, but in keeping with how my contributions have turned out – I have now decided that Fair Words Butter No Parsnips is a title that suits my thoughts and feelings better! Plus it is a phrase that I inherited from my late Nan – Frances Savage. It made me laugh when I was a child, and as it turns out, seems to suit my life quite well these days!
This morning, as I was dropping Jack off at school, I noticed the deputy head walk towards his car, all suited and booted and carrying flowers. Now usually the staff are quite casually dressed so it did make me wonder for a split second what was going on, and then I remembered.
When Jack was born I quickly had to become accustomed to a new way of life. Life that isn’t like your average new parents usually is. Jack was in and out of hospital lots during his early years, and a result sometimes I met other parents in the same position as myself. One of the first was the Mum of a (then) little girl called Rhian. Rhian was a couple of years older than Jack, and was a beautiful, blonde, delicate looking girl with a rare syndrome. Her mother had another daughter previous to Rhian who had the same condition and who had passed away early in life. unfortunately the doctors had indicated to the family that the condition wasn’t genetic, and so they went on to have Rhian, believing that all would be well. unfortunately it wasn’t. Like Jack, Rhian had the same sort of prognosis, but nobody could really say how long she would live. With Jack they said he wouldn’t survive to term in my womb, then he wouldn’t survive birth, then he wouldn’t survive beyond two years and finally he wouldn’t survive childhood. As you know, he’s now 15 – and still here in all his glory. We don’t know how long we have with Jack – just the same as Rhian’s family didn’t know how long they had with her. Over the years I have met more families and we have all really been in the same boat, and over the years I have watched as these precious angels have all gradually slipped away. Up until a couple of weeks ago they were 3 of the “original clan” left. Rhian, Jack & a fine young lad named Nye.
Rhian died a couple of weeks ago. I believe it was known that she was at the end of her short 19 year life, and that her death was expected. Not for one moment does it make the shock and grief any less I imagine. I can’t really think about the day that we lose Jack – so I only have a slight inkling of how her family must be feeling today – the day of her funeral. My thoughts are with her family.
